15-02-2022

I have a friend that I have known for many years. He is in love with me. I am not in love
with him. I assume many stories start this way. He talks about me in a vulgar manner.
every thing I do and say gets turned into something not sexual but perverted. There's
a difference.

It's almost my birthday. He wants to fix me. He's angry with me. He says I'm the one who
started it by accusing him of something. The thing I accused him of was something he did—
I know it happened. He smugly told me about it himself, and only backtracked once he saw
I wasn't laughing. He says I always start everything. He says I'm too sensitive. He says
that I take everything he says too serious, and just because he said something, doesn't
mean it's true, and I should stop assuming that.

I doubt myself. I don't know if he's right. I don't know if I'm truly too sensitive. Maybe
I don't actually feel this way, but I only think I feel this way because somebody told me
to. But I don't know who that would be, because I haven't actually told anyone about this.
Or maybe I have, and I just don't remember doing it. My memory isn't great. Maybe I'm
making things up just to have a reason to feel bad. But I don't think I am. But

I can't trust myself. so.

he says I always get offended at the most random things. I feel like I need to get away.
I don't know what to do. My body is telling me to run. He's my second-oldest friend.

and what if it's all for nothing and I ruin everything again? what if I'm just overreacting

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